Tuesday, February 2, 2010

SHADOW PHIL'OSOPHY ~ By Harry B Sanderford and a few Phils . . .

S H A D O W ~ P H I L ' O S O P H Y
~ By Harry B Sanderford 
and a few guys on the annual trek to Gobblers Knob 
Phil Connors, Phil Collins and Dr. Phil have gathered at Gobbler’s Knob at 4:30 am in the morning  on Tuesday February 2, 2010 to support their fellow Phil, Punxatawny, as he attempts to predict the likelihood of an early spring with the sight of his shadow or lack thereof.

Phil Collins: “It’s against all odds.”
Phil Connors:This is one time where television really fails to capture the true excitement of a large squirrel predicting the weather.”
Puxatawney Phil: Thanks for coming, you guy’s ok? Need anything?
Dr. Phil: “This ain’t my first rodeo son!”
Phil Collins:  “I wish it would rain down.”
Phil Connors:What if there is no tomorrow? There wasn't one today.”
Dr. Phil: “No dog ever peed on a moving car.”
Phil Collins:  “I can feel it in the air..”
Phil Connors: “This is pitiful. A thousand people freezing their butts off waiting to worship a rat. What a hype.”
Puxatawney Phil: Thanks Phil. Always good to get feedback from a colleague.
Dr. Phil:” You don't need a sack of hammers to skin a gopher.”
Puxatawny Phil: C’mon Doc, you know I married a gopher.
Dr.Phil: “You don't need bad manners to pee in a monastery.”
Dr.Phil: “You don't need clam chowder to live in a van down by the river.”
The sun has long past risen and the Phils have taken one giant step back from the Doc who is slobbering, scatting and ranting.
Dr. Phil: “You don't need Cat Scratch Fever to buy a stairway to heaven.”
Dr. Phil: “You don't need a bag of wolverines to make out with somebody's platypus.”
Puxatawny Phil: What in the hell are you talking about Doc? I gotta make my prediction!
Phil Collins:”There's this girl that's been on my mind all the time, Sussudio oh oh”
Dr.Phil:” You don't need husky pants to shock the monkey.”
Phil Connors: “I'll give you a winter prediction: It's gonna be cold, it's gonna be grey, and it's gonna last you for the rest of your life.”

~ Amazing what Harry can do from Gobbler's Knob, the internet,
and significantly . . . the shadowy Sanderford  mind ~ (c) 2010

Harry B. Sanderford is a regular Will Rogers feature attraction here AT THE BIJOU. Come back and see what he does in forward passes with another sports*writer on SuperBowl weekend. In the meantime, read his humour, his sense of sensibility or his grocery list at the Sanderford posterous postings for the so-inclined. Though we ran across this lively character what seems eons ago at the old 6*City stomping grounds, Prairie Home Companion and an Australian surfing magazine have recently made Harry's cresting talents a published gent of some bearing. Though Har's humble as apple crumb pie, I bet your bottom dollar, he'd still tell you about it. You just gotta ask . . . Harry.

~ Absolutely grateful Katefull for Shadow'boys,
shakin' it up with our fine staff of renown, AT THE BIJOU



Michael Solender said...

Totally Outrageous. Exactly what I've come to expect from cowpoke Hal. You don't need a mail truck of monkey butts to know this man delivers.

Kate Pilarcik ~ absolutely said...

"A mail truck of monkey butts"? Yowza MJ, you dancin' wit'the rum and the fresh monkeys again? I thought we all warned you that too many monkeys can make a dancin' man go blind... in agreedom though ~ Whether Har or Hal, he's T.O. ~ as in Totally Outrageous.
~ Absolutely smilin*Kate

Laurita said...

You don't need a PhD to appreciate this. Hilarious!

Harry said...

Thanks you guys! It doesn't take a rocket surgeon to know you guys are the coolest!

Crybbe666 said...

Man, i had to go google who some of these people (and critter) were and it made it even funnier. Thanks Harry for the great start to my day!!

Kate Pilarcik ~ absolutely said...

Wow ... it doesn't take a PhD, a rocket surgeon or a Philipstine to know that you got Phil-ings flyin' high, Harry guy.

Damn funny read in spreadin' all the shadows in all the right contentions. SO VERY GLAD you are part of AT THE BIJOU's spotlight action. ~ Absolutely*Kate ... wonderin' if you noticed that little furry creature in the Men's room? Could you or Paul or Mikey remove it ... uh ... PULEEEEZE?

Anonymous said...

A pleasure to read. More fun than a bucket full of Phil promises.

Madam Z said...

You don't need to know Harry to love him.