Friday, June 29, 2012


Sick in the Head.

By David Barber

Dad, it’s so late.
What are you doing down here
You look a state
Have you been hitting the beer
I’ve been waiting for you, son
Did you forget the curfew
You know, it’s not a lot of fun
Waiting and worrying about you
This is so lame, Dad,
I’m not a kid anymore,
I’m 21, no longer a lad
I’ve got ‘the key to the door’
There’s a killer out there
And I don’t want you dead
Do you think it’s fair
I’m worried out of my head
As I’ve just said
I’m no longer a child
I’ve got a good head
I’m not foolish or wild
Age is immaterial
To a hunter of the flesh
Be it singular or serial
Be it old or be it fresh
Dad, if you want the truth
I went down the pub
I met up with Ruth
I think we’re in love
Are you being serious
That slag from The Crown
That’s fuckin’ hilarious
She’s the bike of the town
You don’t have a clue
You’re so wrong about her
I’m done talking to you
This chat is totally over
You could find another
Not that dirty one
You could do a lot better
Get rid of her, son
My ears are sore
And your words are dead
I’m not listening anymore
I’m going to my bed
Tomorrow you’re staying here
You hear what I said
There’s a maniac out there
Who is sick in the head

The killer targets females
It said so on the news
And according to the details
Takes away their shoes
A guy or a chick
It doesn’t matter, son
If his mind clicks
He’ll strike: job done
Wait, how do you know
That the killer’s a he
The news never said so
It could be a she
Just go to bed, son
You’ll be safe up there
I’m staying down here
I’ll be sat in my chair
I walk up to my room
And close the door
My Dad will be sleeping soon
Of that I’m sure
I take out the blade
From my bedside drawer
And walk over to my wardrobe
Slowly opening the door
In there are my prizes
On the shelf behind my clothes
All styles and sizes
In nice neat rows
Red ones, black ones
Navy ones, too
All expensive leather ones
The best kind of shoe
I leave my room
The knife held in my hand
And walk through the gloom
Not making a sound
I enter his bedroom
My dad’s still downstairs
In a world of dream
Asleep in his chair
I walk to his wardrobe
And open the door
Moving aside a bathrobe
And assess the score
I count up the shoes
My dad is one pair ahead
It obviously proves
We’re BOTH sick in the head

©2012 Author DAVID BARBER
Another original DEBUT ~ AT THE BIJOU
for ~ "The Shadows of Our NOIR"

Absolutely*Kate sails authors
in all their cross currents

David, David, David ~ 
You are a prince 'mongst mere mortals -- You've let ME pub this FIRST! What a gem - and what a beginning to  beguine a whole slew of variant scenes . . . You've a separate book in the making when each stanza-laden delight strings together what you said your head did not know from where  words hailed . . . Hmm, one wonders what could take over a madman so wise?

This is bountifully brill, but you felt that flow from the first to all the cross currents of stream-throughs ~ didn't you? Each stanza evokes both picture and mood and tucks in phrases all just right, just right, just right. Should I effuse any more you'll either get your noggin stuck in doorways or wonder what's in my coffee. 

Well, my head is huge now! You're way too kind! Thank you for enjoying my work, Kate. Poetry isn't normally my thing. Thanks again for the spotlight. It's great to be back submitting work.



needing no license

He knows how to use it.
David Barber was born and bred in Manchester, England, but after 39 years of city life decided to up sticks and move to  Crieff in Scotland with his wife, Lisa, and their two daughters, Imogen and Melissa.  
Having written for a few years when he was younger, fatherhood took hold and, being self employed, earning money suddenly became more important so mindless scribbling had to take a back seat.
It was after a visit back down to Manchester that his childhood friend and fellow writer, Col Bury, invited him to write something for a magazine he was assistant editor of – the award winning magazine Thrillers, Killers ‘n’ Chillers.  He rattled off a six sentence story called 'Sorry Love' and sent it off.  That piece then went off to win a 2nd place Bullet Award.  
Since that day his writing has flowed from fingers to keyboard and onto magazines, such as A Twist of Noir, Near To The Knuckle, The New Flesh and Blink Ink.  He has also had the honour of having stories published in print and in e-book anthologies, True Brit Grit, Action: Pulse Pounding Tales, Off The Record and The Lost Children: A Charity Anthology.
He has just ended an 18 month stint as editor of The Flash Fiction Offensive.  During that time his eye for detail has vastly improved and the editing side of the industry has helped his own writing enormously.
He is currently working on a few projects including a novel and an e-book short story collection.  

David Barber can be found lurking at David Barber ~ Writer  
On Amazon, on Twitter at @thetwoblokes and on Facebook

BUT ~ Be these murmurings


"David moved to Scotland only because he's always want to root for the Dunfermline Athletic Football Club and secondly (maybe more importantly) of his (some say unnatural) attraction (and affection) to the famous Scottish Highland Cow. He's a woolly buggar our David is. "

~ AT THE BIJOU Author AJ Fedora Fella Hayes
(scroll around - see him rough his stuff)

"Dave is a tiler who unwinds by going for a night on the tiles. Dave's beauty therapist wife gives him a makeover every Sunday night. "

~ AT THE BIJOU Author Graham Sensation Smith (scroll around -you'll find him)

"Fact: David Barber once considered being a barber so he could have a business card that said “Barber, Barber” and planned to ply his trade in Sing Sing or else Walla Walla.

"Fiction: As a wee lad, David Barber starred in frightening public information films to warn children away from the dangers of the then popular sport of cat wheedling, but was found to be allergic to moggies and summarily fired. 

They might both be untrue... "

~ Author shady lady, Kate Laity, taking on all the spotlights she can unshadow for an AT THE BIJOU debut . . . as summer goes to a month of Julys.

"David Barber used to model himself on Sweeney Todd before he was arrested for stealing pork pies."

~ Good God, it's Author Godwin, Richard Godwin -- yeah, that's him ~ Watch for The Godwin Show of Shows debuting on hot summer nights, 
RG: Kate your mischievousness will get you in trouble one day, I am fully prepared for my debut at the bijou, I am having my tux steamed. ~ Richard.

"David Barber's nickname as a spotty teen was 'Barbs' to some, and he had (still has?) an uncanny resemblance to Depeche Mode's lead singer, David Gahan. Also, our good friend is a Manchester United fan, BUT he was a ball boy for their/his bitter rivals (and my beloved blues) Manchester City back in the 80's, and I was on the front row behind the goal (slightly envious) as he scampered around the sacred grass collecting any stray balls (coughs) for my (his?) heroes. Is he really a closet Man. City fan...? ;-)" 

~ Author of true grit, cool COL BURY, 
likewise making his AT THE BIJOU Debut
... after novel gets to agent!


You're a star. It looks great and has taken me by surprise. I've been a tad busy this past week with my e-book, which is now available on Amazon. Here's the link if you could (by any chance) add to the post." ~ David

Kate (packing yet, packing yet, for 6'am flight to OuterBanks grand seaside all-the-family-in-the-family vacation) -- "GOTCHA COVERED PAL. But -- YOU are the shining star shootin' off all heights!"

Here ya go folks ~ 


Yep, you can find ~
 David Barber's "The Stranger"
Graham Smith's "Isaa's Island Prison"
Kate Laity's "Chickens"
Richard Godwin's "Savage Sun"
Col Bury's "Gallance"
and Absolutely*Kate's "Angel Tough"
all pulsating in ~
 MATT HILTON'S tumultuous
natch at Amazon, US and UK.

Thanks David for takin' the heat under the spotlights and kleigs ~


~ Absolutely*Kate,
inviting "Come one, come all!"


Sashay or Saunter in every

The popcorn's better buttery,

and the hits?
Heck, they just keep comin'!




you'll next spy ~

the thrill of PAUL BRAZILL

good God, it's GODWIN

shady lady, KATE LAITY

and more,

so very sure
 and shadowy more 

"Be there

or be square, Bub.

You too,


Our Katie puts on


killer shows."


K. A. Laity said...

Audacious splash made by barbed poetry in the spotlight! Nice twist, too. Raising the bar for sure.

Nigel Bird said...

you should see what he can do with a limerick

Paul D Brazill said...

Now, that would make a great Pogues song, you know?

David Barber said...

Thanks, Kate. Glad you liked it!

David Barber said...

Thanks, Nigel. Not my normal thing but glad you enjoyed it.

David Barber said...

Thank you, Paul. If they want to make me an offer for it I'm up for a discussion. Glad you liked, buddy.

Graham Smith said...

Mr Barber is very lyrical with his waxing and tells an entertaining story whichever medium he chooses to use.

Nice one Dave.

David Barber said...

Thanks, mate. Not my normal offering so I'm made up that folk are enjoying it. Cheers, it's been quite a week for me writing wise.

AJ Hayes said...

A'yup. Tole ya it's a good'un, mate. The distinct difference in voice between father and son plays very nicely off of the two characters and add to the perfect pitch of the poem. Cool.
I'm also glad you you made an honest . . . uh . . . bovine out of that highland fling of yours. Many men would have . . . er . . . high tailed, with their kilts a'tilt when given the news. ;)

Helen A. Howell said...

That was fun in a rhythmic way,
he may not be a poet,
but he he sure had the sway.

He story was tense, hard and gritty
it delivered a smack,
with an end that's not pretty.

Well done David!

David Cranmer said...

Like father, like son! I enjoy your poetry, Dave. More, sir.

David Barber said...

Haha! Thanks, AJ, both for your fine comments and your invaluable advice. Appreciated, my friend.

David Barber said...

Thank you, Helen. Happy that you enjoyed it.

David Barber said...

Thanks, David. Appreciate you stopping by. I'm working on more so you never know...

Anonymous said...

David this is fantastic. One of your best pieces.


David Barber said...

That means a lot, Jeanette, coming from a writer of poetry. Not my normal style so I'm made up with your comment. Thank you!!

Lily Childs said...

Serial killer poetry - gotta be a first? The world needs more, and Paul's made that great suggestion... do you think Shane McGowan would be up for a sing-song?

Earthy, succinct - with a double twist in your inimitable style. Loved it!

David Barber said...

Thank you, Lily. From you, a very fine poet, that's a great comment. Much appreciated.

seana graham said...

I didn't expect a funny ending, that's for sure. Way to deliver a twist!

Unknown said...

Dave, me old mucker. Soz, am a tad late to the party, but I've been on the old graveyard shifts. I read it on my break as soon as it was up, but didn't wanna do a short message via my mobile.

The subject matter and twist in this poem are superb, and typical of you. However, what I admire most is the fact that with you being a bit like me when it comes to poetry (as in, not really studied the craft much compared to fiction), you put your head on the chopping block of this glamorous stage. Then, the literary Executioners read it, took their hoods off and helped you to your feet, announcing, "Walk. You're a free man."

You nailed it, bud. Good 'n' proper.

PS.Kate, Thanks for the lovely mentions. x

David Barber said...

Thanks, Seana. As I've said, it's not my normal writing style but I seem to have pulled it off. Glad you liked it.

David Barber said...

Col, as ever you make me feel pretty chuffed with myself. Thanks, as always, my friend!!

Anonymous said...

That was brilliant! Excellent twist!

David Barber said...

Thanks, Ruth. Appreciate it!

KjM said...

A nicely told tale. I wondered about the Dad, and thus was worried about Ruth.

Now I'm even more worried about Ruth!

This may not have been your usual style - but you carried it off very well.

David Barber said...

Thanks for the comments, KjM. They mean a lot. Cheers!